Posts

I Am Not Afraid of the Friendzone

Let me start with a bold statement: I am not afraid of the friendzone. In fact, I’m drawn to it. The friendzone, for me, is not some dark pit of unrequited affection, nor is it the place where romantic dreams go to die. No, the friendzone is a breath of fresh air—a place where I can care for someone deeply without any need to play the games that dating so often requires. Here’s a secret: I think the friendzone gets a bad rap. Most people talk about it as a place of eternal suffering, a purgatory where affection is given, but love is never reciprocated. But I’ve come to realize that being in the friendzone is often the *opposite* of suffering; it’s freeing. It’s a place where I can be affectionate, genuine, and even vulnerable, without the constant fear of my intentions being misinterpreted. There’s an ease in knowing I can be kind, supportive, or even downright mushy with someone without having to wonder, *“Did I come on too strong?”* As someone who has often fancied herself commitment

Jeez, Emotional Regression: I Will NEVER Again Judge People Who Hook Up at High School Reunions!

You know those stories about people who have been happily married for 30 years, only to attend a high school or grade school reunion and suddenly fall head over heels for their old crush? The kind of emotional tornado where they’re even considering leaving their families behind? I always thought those people were either going senile or, frankly, just losing their grip on reality. That was until it happened to me. Emotional regression is real, and it hit me like a ton of bricks. After years of being jaded about love, worn down by failed relationships, and tired of the dating game, I found myself suddenly transported back in time—emotionally, at least.  All it took was seeing the familiar face of a person I forgot about -- a guy I had an unrequited crush on. We hadn’t spoken in years, but as soon as I saw him, it was like I was 12 again, full of butterflies and awkward excitement. I didn’t expect it. I had moved on, grown up, and buried tons of memories of my early years. But seeing him

Breakups Teach Us to Embrace the Unknown

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Life is a series of uncertainties, and perhaps one of the most profound uncertainties we face is the unpredictability of our relationships. Break-ups, though often painful and emotionally taxing, offer us a valuable lesson in navigating the uncharted waters of the unknown. They teach us to appreciate, or at the very least, accept the concept of not knowing and help us realize that this ambiguity is something we can handle. In a world driven by the need for control and certainty, it's easy to forget that life is inherently uncertain. We plan meticulously, expecting every step to follow a predetermined path. Relationships, too, fall victim to this desire for predictability. We enter into them with the expectation that they will last forever, that love will always conquer all, and that the future is set in stone. But reality often has other plans. Break-ups shatter these illusions. They remind us that even the most promising relationships can unravel, leaving us in a state of emotiona

Did You Lose Your “Mojo” to Your Ex?

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What is ‘mojo’? Mojo is a simple charm you keep with you at all times to turn bad luck into good fortune. In the personal development context, it’s that magic you have about you that makes you a success, lands you a job and gets you what you want. It’s your ‘aura’; the thing that makes you unforgettable. The glint in your eye, or the snap in your every step. It’s that certain something that keeps you confident. We use this inner charm when we need to get something done, like when we want to impress someone or when we want to drive good fortune into our lives by the power of our mind alone. It is my belief that everyone is born with this ‘magic’ or ‘blessing’.  Considering this, it makes me wonder why a person would feel like he has lost this magic when a relationship ends. More than once, I’ve heard someone else say the phrase ‘unlucky in love’ with a dejected sigh. So… Did You Lose Your “Mojo” to Your Ex? After a break up, you might feel like you’re just a husk of your former self; an

Questions When to Transition from Platonic Friends to Hopeful Lovers

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We've all heard those heartwarming tales of friends turned lovers in movies, songs, and maybe even in our own lives. There's something undeniably magical about the shift from platonic to romantic, where the familiar becomes something more. Today, we're delving into this enchanting realm, guided by Anne's (not her real name) relatable story, to help you decipher whether that special someone in your life might be feeling more than just friendship. Signs of a Budding Romance     Anne's predicament is a common one. She's caught in the gray area between friendship and romance, unsure of where her guy friend's heart truly lies. But, worry not, Anne – there are some telltale signs that can help you navigate this emotional terrain. Anne's question 1: We have a mutual understanding. It's like we're a couple without really talking about it. Everyone we know sees us as a couple. Are we really a couple? Response to Anne: Hey, Anne! First of all, kudos to you

The Aftermath of a Breakup: When Is It Time to Move On?

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When my serious relationship ended, I didn’t realize how much time I’d spend replaying every moment, wondering where it all went wrong. There’s a certain weight that comes with breakups, a dull ache that makes it feel like the world is standing still while you’re still sifting through the ruins of what was once “us.” Moving on is never easy — it took me longer than I’d like to admit — but it’s also a necessary step in regaining your sense of self. Here’s what I learned from my personal experience when it comes to knowing when it’s time to move on after a breakup.        1.     You’re Holding on to Hope, But Nothing’s Changing     After my breakup, I kept clinging to the idea that we might get back together. I would analyze our last conversations, hoping to find some hidden message or clue that things could be fixed. I wasn't ready to accept that it was truly over. But with each passing day, nothing changed. The silence on their end said everything. At some point, you need to be hon

Rediscovering Yourself After a Relationship: Who Were You Before "Us"?

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There’s a strange kind of fog that rolls in after a breakup. Not just the obvious heartache or grief, but a deeper sense of disorientation — as if you've lost something more than just the relationship. For many of us, the hardest part of moving on isn’t letting go of the other person; it’s remembering who we were before the relationship ever began. When you’ve spent so much time being part of an “us,” it’s easy to forget what it felt like to be “just you.” I know this because I’ve been there. I woke up one day, long after the breakup, and realized that I couldn’t remember what made me   me   before the relationship. My interests, my routines, even the way I saw myself had become so wrapped up in the other person that I had no idea where they ended and I began.        How It Happens: The Slow Disappearance of “You” This loss of identity doesn’t happen all at once. It’s gradual, like a slow unraveling. You compromise, you adjust, and before you know it, your decisions — big and small