Evil Woobie

Being new to Online Dating can be scary. Some doubts that make people hesitate include being skeptical about the characters they will meet online, not being able to project a good image of themselves… or simply the fear of interaction. The first step to online dating is considering what your objectives are. Do you go to a dating site to a.) meet friends? b.) hook up (for sex)? or c.) simply hang out?

Once you got your objectives straight, you may now choose a dating site to join. Note that not all dating sites are the same and most will cater to different audiences. One other factor to consider is language. Seek out the dating sites that cater to people who speak your native language so that you’re more comfortable at the onset.

Here are some of my recommendations on how to deal with this whole online dating thing:

1. Strive to create a profile that will reflect your personality more than your looks.

Sure there are options to put in your exact height, body measurements, skin and eye color, ethnicity and such, but what you must focus on is your likes and dislikes, as this will be the basis of the other people who will want to meet you. The phrase “anything fun” is too general, while “nature and photography” is specific. You will also be asked to create a short tagline for your profile, and for this I suggest putting in your objectives for being there, i.e. to meet friends who are bi-lingual like me.

2. Take the tests

Usually, there is an option to take a personality test. Some of the best ones I have encountered are FastCupid’s (Smart Singles) and One Good Love’s (GLBT). These tests are designed to tell you more about yourself and how you will react to others. This is a good thing why? Self discovery will show you your strengths and weaknesses, and will serve as a guide on who to choose to chat with.

3. How to react to pushy individuals

There’s an unwritten rule to never be too specific about your personal info in online dating sites. For your protection, never give your phone number and address. The best way to put off the “let’s meet up, what’s your address” request is to simply say that you will be revealing it ’sometime’ when you’re more comfortable to do so. If your chat mate pushes too hard, close the chat window.

Final Reminders

Remember to have fun with it. Self expression and how people see you should be the least of your worries as long as you view the interaction in a positive way. Dating online is slightly different from offline dating, and trust as well as real love will sometimes take months or years to come. A long distance affair is not as difficult as it seems, as long as you keep your perspective and you’re enjoying it.

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